To being heartbroken… again…

So Jay and I were coming up for 6 months together.. things were going great! We were spending a lot of time together… And generally having fun!
Dinners at his house..
Family time.. He told me about his younger horse riding days.. His trip to America…

He even came with me to the stables one evening to check out Amber’s mouth – see if the dentist Andrew Potch had done any work on her..

We had sleep overs, braai’s, movie nights… There was one oopsie but we dealt with it and he was great about it and gave me the support I needed…
I even cooked breakfast for him and his mom.. Me cooking.. that says a lot about how much I cared about this boy..

But it seems it wasn’t enough…

One moment he is planning to do things with me on the weekend – just us alone and telling me how awesome I am and the next he is ignoring me and and when I asked him whats going on he tells me he cant be in a relationship with me as things are too hectic for him at home…

And this was via Whatsapp.. Not even a phone call – let alone face to face.. And he didn’t answer my calls when I tried to call him.. That is wrong on a whole other level.
He couldn’t even tell me why; couldn’t give me a real reason or explanation…

My heart broke into one million tiny little pieces… I did not see this coming..
And yet I was decent about it.. Said I would give him the space he asked for.. Not that that means anything right now.. It means I gave up without a fight…

Where did I go wrong? What did I do wrong? I don’t think I did anything wrong.

Unless puking in your friends car – that I paid to get valet’d and driving myself home at one hell of speed cos I was drunk and didn’t wanna puke on myself in case I vommed while driving – counts.. Maybe it did..
I think I make a pretty good girlfriend. I am not clingy, suspicious, nagging, pushy. I gave him space, I wasn’t messaging him hundreds of times a day..

I didn’t make any of the first moves.. I waited for him to be ready for everything… And this is what I get in return.. A broken heart and no explanation..

What the FUCK is wrong with me?

I deserve to be treated better than this.. But it still hurts..

I was the better person.. Said I would give him space.. in the hope that it would not over forever but that is just me being pathetic and not owning up to a breakup
I know that this is over – he called it…
He hasn’t deleted me off Facebook yet or blocked my number on Whatsapp even though its only been two weeks and that might change. It wont change – just accept that facts and move on Megan…
He probably just got bored… Cos that’s what happens right??

🙁heart-broken

 

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